Saturday, January 12, 2013

Paper Towns...but really, John Green

If John Green walked up to me and said, "Spread your legs, because I'm gonna kick you in the balls."

I'd be like, "But, that will hurt."

John Green would just stare at me.

I would think of Alaska.  Then I would think of Margo, the new girl in my life.  Then I would look John Green in the eyes.  Then I would spread my legs.


I was gonna buy a Sarah Dessen book, but my oldest son was with me.  I picked up one of her books.  The cover featured a teenage girl on a bike wearing a bikini top and booty shorts.  There was no way in hell I was gonna try to explain that to my son.  I put it back, but made a mental note...

I slid Paper Towns out from the tightly packed John Green shelf.

Now THIS is a manly book cover.  There's a big, red...thumbtack..on it.  It was probably a very sharp, dangerous thumbtack.  There's no telling how many able-bodied men lost fingers trying to push that thumbtack in.  Yes.  This must be a manly book.

Just as I began to pull away from the bookshelf my eyes were pulled back by a mysterious force.

Time stood still.

The letters on the cover spelling Paper Towns started moving.  They swirled and jumped and changed places.  Some of the letters disappeared.  Five letters remained: A, E, N, S, P.

And then one by one they started dropping into place.

S...N...A...P...E

Snape.

"Oh my god," I said.

John Green is not who we think he is.


Paper Towns is a good read.  I like Looking for Alaska better, but I like Margo (Paper Towns MC) better than Alaska (Looking for Alaska MC) as a girlfriend for the teenage me.

Paper Towns has all the John Green trademarks: teenagers that sound like teenagers, flawless humor and life's deep questions explored in an appropriate, and clever, way.

John Green is a master at creating authentic characters.  I wouldn't be surprised if he disguised himself as a 16-year-old boy and still attended high school.

My only complaint about this book is it didn't have enough Margo in it.  Most of the book is other characters speculating about Margo.  I just wanted more actual Margo.

Why Guys Should Read This Book

Margo

Loads of sex jokes

The world's largest collection of Black Santas

Honeybunnies



It's a good read.  I recommend it.  I give it 5 out of 7 burritos.












7 comments:

  1. I agree that Paper Towns wasn't as good as Looking for Alaska, but STILL. John Green's characters are incredible and his writing is just brilliant! Glad you enjoyed this one!

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  2. This was hilarious! Both the knowingly-subjecting-yourself-to-pain bit and the sudden Snape realization. Really enjoying your blog! Glad I discovered it!

    I've read Looking for Alaska and Fault in Our Stars. I enjoyed FIOS more because the characters were a little more kind and innocent, but you are totally right in saying that John Green is a master of characterization. His characters come alive.

    Happy reading!
    Lauren @ Hughes Reviews

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  3. Ahhhh, Paper Towns! I need to read this but I am illogically putting it off because once I do read it then I won't have any more books that are entirely written by John Green to read until he writes a new one. Also sex jokes are the best. Cannot wait to read this but I am still illogically going to put this off until I know Green has another book coming out.

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  4. Hey, Have you read Girls for Breakfast or Stop Me If You've Heard This One Before by David Yoo...or King Dork by Frank Portman? Some of my personal YA guy books. Love your blog by the way!

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  5. Paper Towns is probably my least favorite JG book, but that doesn't mean I don't freaking love it.

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  6. Yes, Paper Towns is not my favorite of JG's books. At the end I felt a bit dissatisfied. Granted, I read it years ago and can't tell you WHY I felt that way now.

    You should really read his "The Fault of Our Stars" because 1) it's amazing 2) I would love to hear a Manly review of it.

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